Posted 8/21/20
He replied, “My mother and brothers are those who hear God’s word and put it into practice.” Luke 8:21
Howdy all! I trust your week has gone well! Mine, while a blur, has been nice although I sure wish we were getting closer and not more distant from the opportunity to really visit the nursing home. Just a reminder that next week begins Meme Week on the blog. If you have a nice or funny meme you would like to share, shoot me a link. 🙂
The topic in today’s idea salad: the tomato…and dementia, of course. Naturally similar, eh? The thought came up this morning, in the wee hours, when I was loading up my car to go to work. I looked over at my poor, beleaguered, potted tomato plants, made wilty by 2 weeks without rain and having been the “Little Tomato Plant that Could” by producing at least 10 nice tomatoes, and noticed that she was still bearing fruit!! This morning I picked 3 tomatoes off of what amounted to a tumbleweed. It brought a tear to my eye as my thoughts transitioned to dementia…so I went to work on the piece (as I drove in.)
I, had I not been baptist, would bet you $20 that we can learn a handful of things about dementia using a tomato… Let’s find out. 🙂
First a one-minute video demonstrating how I made this tomato correlation:
Tomatoes are a fruit. Science Bob tells us so, so it must be the case. It is considered a fruit because it has seeds. First, this reminds me of an idiom: “Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad“. I love that. Dementia tie in? Expect the unexpected, and learn as you go. Tomatoes are a fruit. They are NOT, however, in the fruit section of the store. Learning a tomato is a fruit can inform your shopping process, but experience is how you know where to go in the produce section. Knowing the facts about dementia is great, but you will learn a lot more by visiting patients. Waaaay back when, I was told dementia was mainly about “forgetting”…but I hadn’t considered the ramifications…the context…until I studied it and watched it in action. It is one thing to “forget” my name…it is another entire kind of plant to “forget” how to tell warm from cold, how to “forget” that you shouldn’t touch a hot stove, or to “forget” that you are, or aren’t hungry. Mom did each of these and more, and, at wits end on how to keep her safe, we were forced into considering a nursing home. Learn the facts…but learn in person too. Things will make more sense as you do…
Older tomato plants still produce fruit. I had given up on my tomato plant. It had lived a long, happy life and had personally given me at least 3 salads worth of joy. So…why did I give up when it withered a little? I guess I figured that the best was behind me instead of enjoying the fruit that was still left. I, of all people, should know better… Lesson learned. BTW…“only” 10% of seniors 65 and older have dementia. Learn two things from this fact: 1. A lot of folks have the disease in this group. Millions. And, age is the number one risk factor for developing the disease. But 2. Dementia is NOT a normal part of aging! Take care of yourself! Walk. Eat right. Stop smoking. Prune off a few pounds if necessary. You matter. The best years…and fruit… are yet to come, given the experience and relationships you have…
Moderation is important in tomatoes… and in life. My little potted tomato plant got a pretty good variety of sun and shade. I let the rain fall on her, but brought her to the porch when it was storming or if there was a chance of a freeze. Early in her life (especially), I was careful to remove her suckers, but not to prune the good branches. Each of these things remind us that too much of a good or a bad thing tends to lead to undesirable results. In our lives, even as a believer and to the chagrin of fellow Baptists, it is OK to drink alcohol, perhaps with a meal. It is OK to watch TV. It is OK to stay up late and sleep little to see the birth of a child, perhaps. However, moderation tends to be wisdom. Excessive alcohol consumption ( a sin) causes one type of dementia and may contribute to others. (and the corresponding weight gain, experienced by some heavy drinkers exacerbates the problem…). Not sleeping enough on a day-to-day basis can contribute to your risk of dementia. TV instead of exercise can also result in weight gain, blood sugar issues, and the like…all contributors to dementia risk. Are you good at moderation? If not, be careful. When in doubt, don’t do the bad thing…do the better thing instead.
A little work now makes all the difference. Notice in the pix that the soil still looked pretty good, with a small hint of fertilizer present. I hadn’t watered her in quite a while and she was still doing good enough to produce 3 tomatoes today. Imagine how she would have done with a little more…or if I had some help. (ahem, Applegate kids…). Work was and is required. How about in finding a cure? Oh yes…there is much work to be done! So much that a few cannot do it alone. Nobody can do everything, but everyone can do something. Let’s divide and conquer. You spread some fertilizer (this blog has been compared to such…but haters gonna hate.), he can watch for bugs (I will define a bug as a politician who is uninformed on the topic. 😉 ), she can water periodically (raise money?), and the two over there can watch the weather with their scientific gear (clinical trial participants willing to give of their time for the science of a cure is always needed.). Everyone can have a role in finding a cure.
Time is limited. Despite the fact…the very real fact, based on her looks…that my little plant gave me some fruit today, her time is almost up. I expect she will be gone soon. Dementia steals time. Mom should be enjoying her retirement years these days instead of sitting, largely alone, day-in and day-out like she is. The average life span of a beloved person with dementia varies, but is typically from 8-10 years from onset of symptoms. Mom was diagnosed 10 years ago, but the symptoms were only daily life-changing in the last handful. These figures vary when accompanied by other conditions, and every kind of dementia…indeed every person…has a different experience. But, as of 8/21/20, the results are always the same….time is limited.
Objectivity goes out the window sometimes. I am proud of my “garden”. I know…it is one pot of plants…but they are my plants. They are collectively a her and she was the last thing I see as I leave for work every day in my front yard. Others may not understand, nor think she qualifies as a garden. I get it. Around 20 years ago I had a house with a huge garden. 24×36′ in size and quite robust. But it was a little less personal than my little. Others would think it as more of a garden than my little tomato pot. That’s ok. When others look at dementia from the outside, with no horse in that race, if you will, they appreciate the problem…but it is mixed into the garden with cancer, heart disease, and the rest. I get it. Those stink too. I have lost many with them… I also know this blog makes dementia seem like it is the biggest killer of all. Alas, it is only the 6th leading killer, but it is the only one without a cure nor a life-extending treatment. Insomuch as I overstate the horror of the disease, I do somewhat apologize, I suppose. But it is personal. Mom fixed every boo boo, made every meal, and provided every mom hug for much of my early life. She gets me…and she will be gone soon. Every day as I leave the driveway…or the nursing home…I wonder if it will be the last with her… It is truly a terrible disease, and a dreadfully long goodbye.
#EndALZ
Update: Nothing…remembering waving goodbye after our visit Wednesday knowing she is a microscopic COVID germ or a dementia-induced system failure away from it being the last wave. Stinkin’ disease…
Dad Joke of the day:
Last note: There is no such thing as an Attack of the Killer Tomato…but if it was possible, I expect this is its big year!