Posted 8-2-19
Signs
The 5 Man Electrical Band
lyrics as recorded by The Five Man Electrical Band in 1971
And the sign said “Long-haired freaky people need not apply”
So I tucked my hair up under my hat and I went in to ask him why
He said “You look like a fine upstanding young man, I think you’ll do”
So I took off my hat, I said “Imagine that. Huh! Me workin’ for you!”
Whoa-oh-oh
Sign, sign, everywhere a sign
Blockin’ out the scenery, breakin’ my mind
Do this, don’t do that, can’t you read the sign?
And the sign said anybody caught trespassin’ would be shot on sight
So I jumped on the fence and-a yelled at the house, “Hey! What gives you
the
right?”
“To put up a fence to keep me out or to keep mother nature in”
“If God was here he’d tell you to your face, Man, you’re some kinda sinner”
Sign, sign, everywhere a sign
Blockin’ out the scenery, breakin’ my mind
Do this, don’t do that, can’t you read the sign?
Now, hey you, mister, can’t you read?
You’ve got to have a shirt and tie to get a seat
You can’t even watch, no you can’t eat
You ain’t supposed to be here
The sign said you got to have a membership card to get inside
Ugh!
—— lead guitar solo…(of course…lol)——
And the sign said, “Everybody welcome. Come in, kneel down and pray”
But when they passed around the plate at the end of it all, I didn’t have a
penny to pay
So I got me a pen and a paper and I made up my own little sign
I said, “Thank you, Lord, for thinkin’ ’bout me. I’m alive and doin’ fine.”
Wooo!
Sign, sign, everywhere a sign
Blockin’ out the scenery, breakin’ my mind
Do this, don’t do that, can’t you read the sign?
Sign, sign, everywhere a sign
Sign
Sign, signLyrics licensed and provided by LyricFind
(For those who don’t like some of these lyrics, here is an awesome parody version by the Christian band Apologetix. Also, don’t YouTube the Petra version…they make the lyrics more profane.)
Writer’s note: The 5 Man Electrical Band are NOT theologians/Christians (as far as I know) or a trustworthy fan of capitalism. The song is, however, catchy and it does prove some points I will make about dementia. The early 1970’s were a tumultuous time…we may have to offer some grace here. 😉
Signs are all around us and are every size, shape and color. Some are positive, others negative and some confusing. We live in a world filled with them, so we might as well get used to them. Here are my random thoughts on “Signs” as related to Nursing Homes/Memory Care Units/Aging:
- First of all, please realize that one man’s “Long-haired freaky” person is another man’s solid employee. Not everyone with a piercing or a tattoo is a drug addict, a serial murderer, a bank robber or the like. (an similarly, not everyone dressed in a suit is a moral person either…) I don’t have piercings or tattoos, but that fact, in and of itself, doesn’t make me better than or more than in any way. It could just mean I have a wife and 3 expensive kids who spend all of the money. 😉 Care facilities are desperate for employees. All of the medical field is desperate for employees. I am not judging you for frustration about piercings and tats. I understand (and sympathize) where you are coming from. I really do. Most under 50 don’t see the evolution of these things, they just know the now…that they are typical. Times, they are a changin’, for better or worse. These choices are so widespread now they are more of a fashion accessory than an edgy sign of rebellion like they were in 1971 when the above song was penned. There are bigger fish to fry in the culture war than such.
- Nursing homes (and hospitals) need more signs for the visitors to direct traffic. I have an outstanding sense of direction…until I hit the sanitary tile of one of these places and I become like a lemming, just following and hoping. Come on, facility managers, visitors need no further excuse to NOT VISIT. 🙁
- The signs on the hallway doors to the memory unit tell you a lot about how terrible this disease is. There is a punch-pad code to enter and to leave. The actual code is stuck just above the touch pad for all to see. A patient–who perhaps used to be a CEO, a Fireman, a Bank President, or a computer expert–can stare at the punch-pad and the code and have absolutely no clue what to do with said information.
- One of the biggest signs of a health downturn or a need of help for a senior is falling. Falling is NOT a normal part of aging! Call your Area Agency on Aging for various types of help in this area. Here is our local one and they could point you to your own area’s location.
- There are signs on every door that, if you understand what they mean, explain whether the patient wants to be resuscitated in the event of a defined health “episode”. (Everyone needs to make known their wishes as to how to treat them in the event of a catastrophe. Don’t leave it to the family to guess. It makes my walk more sad as I head to see my mom. I guess it shouldn’t, but I am human…)
- From the verse on the above song about a restaurant requiring a shirt and tie, a reminder: Dementia is no respecter of people, of $, of hair color, of anything. Rich folks die of this mess daily as do poor folks…by the thousands.
- As I drive to work every day I have three (!) sections of road construction to bob and weave through in Tempo One, my luxurious 1991 Ford Tempo sedan. The signs clearly say 55MPH, they have speed guns mounted with big readouts that show how fast you are going and flash if you are speeding. I do 55 through them and get flipped off, tailgated, and almost ran off the road on a daily basis for following the signs. I have friends at MODOT, and I hate to see them get clipped by an idiot speeding. OK…this one has no dementia tie-in other than the fact that many of the other drivers probably think I have a cognitive impairment because of following the law. I do not as evidenced by my passing the AARP Smart Driver course at SeniorAge this week. (I was running the laptop for the presenter and passed in the process 🙂 )
- Seriously though, and last…don’t ignore the signs of dementia in yourself or your loved one. I have labored in this blog to point out the many advantages of knowing and the lack of good reasons NOT to know if there are problems in this area. We screen for colon cancer in a quite yucky way…come on, reader! It is comparatively easy to get a baseline cognitive test and discuss the situation with friends and family. Finding out early helps for a host of reasons that I have listed scads of times here. 🙂 Just do it. Here are some tips about having the talk.
Update: Had another great visit with mom yesterday. She is happy and doing well, all things considered. My stepdad’s birthday went well too. Say what you want about him, he still goes there 3x a day and feeds mom meals and hangs out. He liked his gift: a solar-powered duck birdbath.
Another sign for your consideration:
The last sign? Signing off for the week. See you Monday. 🙂
#EndALZ