Posted 11-12-19
I had a great childhood. The American Dream was alive and well
Ball games, family trips, collecting arrowheads, laughter and tears
The Booming Eighties had the best of times and the worst of times
Prosperity yet a rough divorce, but never alone
Two Homes, Two Families: finding a brand new normal
I was focused on me, like most teens did back then
Doing what felt good…eating to distract myself
Fledgling faith with no effort… withering
Found love, lost it, and found it again
Married, happy, busy, learning
College and work ruled the day
Three wonderful kids: joy
Started a business
Learned tech, grew faith
Happy, sad
#EndALZ
Mom
I will grant you that penning lyrics in descending syllables from 17 to one in an unrhymed, kinda poetic outline form is an unusual way to present your life to someone. However, that, in my odd way, is where I find myself these days. I am in a holding pattern, daily boiling life down like mom used to do to her me-famous syrup. I live daily the “long goodbye” of Alzheimer’s and I expect some of you are doing the same.
So, what can we do? Wait? Sigh. Move on? Never! Fight? Yes.
Here is my inverted outline of my future life, going forward:
Mom
#EndALZ
Embrace joy
Work Hard, Pray Hard
Be my best at work
Love on my family
Fight to defeat dementia
Replace “busy” with intention
Improve my already great marriage
Growing my faith with more effort…daily
Reinvent myself: Version 2 will get healthy
Focus on me my spiritual gift of service
One Home, One Family, embrace all of life’s changes
Prosperity redefined as contentment with today
The Booming Twenties: more of the best of times; the worst of times
Concerts, some grandbabies?, collecting memories, laughter and tears
I will finish strong. The American Dream is still alive and well.
You see, all, it is hard not to get into a rut. In fact, this “long goodbye” furrows a big one under our feet daily. However, if we are to be our very best for our family, for our loved ones, for our employers and for our Lord, we must press on and always be diligent to grow in the pain. Shall we fight on together? Through life’s ups and downs…or perhaps through life’s cascading syllables penned by a digital cornbreaded goober? We have no viable alternative…so let’s do this.
#EndALZ
Unfortunately, after driving 30 minutes to make it less than 2 miles and seeing flaming cars everywhere (!), I gave up and headed home yesterday and didn’t get to see mom. Mom version 1.0 would have kicked my butt for even trying to battle our icy day yesterday anyway. My stepdad said she had another good day, so the good streak continues. Oh the cascading roller coaster of this disease! Sigh… We need a cure! I promise we will talk less about me tomorrow. 😉